Friday, May 30, 2008

Twenty Two

Twenty Two...
That is the number of hours I spent in the car with my husband and three small children this weekend. We made the hike up to NY to see my family.
I must say here, in a bit of mommy-braggadociousness
( ** new wordage alert... Mommy-braggadociousness, to make a proud statement about one's child in a purely humble way, not an in your face your kid bites kind of way, cause that would be mommy-stuckupitybragging. Getting the two confused can cost you time and friends...oh, and the term bite was not literal in its use there, sorry for any confusion, as the mom of a former vampire, I would never joke about that.)

So, my three little stinkers were so good in the car. I have always been very opposed to DVD players in the vehicle. I want my boys to have to read and play and color, not sit and zone out in couch potato mode... BUT alas... Kohls had too good a sale to pass up and we got a portable DVD player for the trip.
Well, I am proud to say, that it was not over used at all. We were on the road a good 5 hours before we ever used it, and when I broke out Peter Pan, still wrapped in its cellophane, I knew, this was a good cave on my part.

Here is the picture... and yes, that is my kids laying down on the floor. We are bad parents who lay down two of the second row seats so they can get out and stretch a bit. I have determined that any sheriff or child advocate group that wants to condemn me can travel across country with my kids and see how they fair if they are never allowed out of the booster seat, AKA Car-Jail.

This was also Alden Angel Baby Status test time... would he turn into a shrieking banshee on the road? Would his normally calm demeanor vanish when tied down for all those hours? Nope! He was great and I was so happy. He did have an allergic reaction to the borrowed pack and play we used and his little eyes swelled almost shut, just like Em's do. We think it may be a dog allergy, but who knows? I was just glad the swelling went away (eventually) cause really, it ws not such a cute look for him.

So, seeing my family was good. Saying goodbye was no fun. The trip home was uneventful save this little story...
We are driving along, only a couple hours from home. If you have ever traveled with children you know that you could feasibly stop every fifteen minutes to use the bathroom. Well, having boys is a good thing here because they can, well...
Oh, let's just be honest here everyone...

Boys can totally pee in a cup and save you the stop.

Mind you, you must be prideLESS enough to hold the cup, keep the urinator standing still and say "Keep that thing pointed DOWN!" So, we have had two such recent "fill ups" in our old take out cups. They are waiting for dumpage at the next stop. (what did you think I dumped them out the window while driving...ewwww, and how would you explain that littering to a cop?)
Now, I wake from my motion induced sleep and see Micah switching lanes and some car getting, well... ticked. They come charging up the right hand lane, only to be met with the back end of a semi. Um, hello??? Did you think that semi was going to move for you and your little two door red car? So, the guy in the passenger seat waves a water bottle at us...

Are we now offering drinks as a form of car cursing?
"Well, take this Pepsi you Coke loving tailgater!"
"Drink my poison Evian you slowpoke!"
"Gatorade to YOU!"

Whatever, waving the water bottle was weird at best.
So, several miles later, she, the driver, is back on our butts and now, my Micah is grinning and just staying right alongside the semi.... Box Out Style.
"Really, dear, are you doing this on purpose?

"What?" he asks, shocked. " I am just keeping with the flow of traffic. Am I being Vinbedient?"
DOH! My own words coming back to get me!
So, he moves over to the right lane and as small red car speeds by, the guy waves his water bottle out his window at us, dumping its pitiful remains out.
Dude, if we want to dump car beverages, we have so got you beat with our little pee bombs here...
Not to mention, our car sits like 10 feet higher than yours, so unless you know something about gravity we don't, that was the weakest from of road rage ever.
The best part???
The "Baby on Board" sign prominently (and proudly???) displayed in the back window...
Very nice.

Here are some recent Scrapations. (**double whammy today on the wordage alerts folks... scrap + creation = scrapations. I like it.)

And a little book reviewage. I just finished "These is My Words" by Nancy Carter. It was of course a recommended read from THE LitChick. I really could not put it down. It is a fictional diary set in the late 1800s in the Arizona territory. Great characters and the author really makes you love the main ones. I think one way I judge a book is by the way my imagination responds to it. Am I picturing the settings, the characters faces, etc. This was a good one for sure!


  1. Oh I'm so glad you let your boys pee in cups(only in the car, of course), too. Sean is the only risk taker{cup holder) though. I am not taking the risk of getting warm pee trailed up my arm as I hold the cup. No way.

    And the road rage, totally weak. Morons. I hope they felt stupid afterwards.


  2. Wow that's a lot of hours in the car with 3 kids. Kuddos to them for doing so well!

  3. i so wish we could pee in cups that would be the bomb...glad your trip was nice...

    love love love your pages...especially the 2nd one

  4. hey i just let mine pee on the side of the road lol no holding not that brave lol!!!that is nothing for road rage but very funny!!!

  5. We drove from Michigan to Florida and back and laid on the floor and everything. We even slept the NIGHT in the car while it was in motion just to get there...

    And we have never peed in the car while it is in motion, but we have pulled along the side of the road and let Tanner do his fact, I just had Tanner do it while at WDW this past weekend. We were in a parking lot and there was not a bathroom in sight.

    Daddy got to help while I walked to the car :)

    And did you throw the pee?

  6. oh my word and your stories!
    But they do crack me up :)
    totally with you on avoiding the dvd player at first...but it sure is nice for the longer trips!

  7. glad you had a good trip! It can be painful especially when you hear, "are we there yet?!" like 50 million times, lol. I love our portable dvd player too!
    awesome layouts girl!

  8. snicker....snort...hehehehehee... oh I'm not sure I could have resisted the tempting call of those pee actually had a guy get pissed at me on the road and he threw the bottle at my car, a full bottle, left a nice little dent. However, I am so digging the new verbage. Are you writing all these down in a book so we have a Judinary to work with?????? Thanks for the love on my blog girlie. Huggs

  9. dude.
    i miss you!

  10. 1. clearly if i kept up on your blog like i should i wouldn't email you qs about books...duh.

    2. be happy that your boys UNDERSTAND how the car cup works. poor Caleb was holding the cup over himself creating a fountain effect.

    glad your trip was a success!
    and love the new l/os - gonna have to lift a couple designs :)

  11. dude! 22 hours in the car?! :D
    I'm all for making it as comfortable as possible too..looks like the boys were having fun. That's crazy about the road rage, people are such idiots!

  12. Oh lord this post was soooo hilarious...I knew there was a multitude of reasons I wanted boys and now you've pointed out just a few!!!

  13. Jude, you are too much! I always love reading your renditions of "motherhoodidness" (Like that?)lol

    I'm glad you guys had a safe & fun trip. SOOO, next trip is to GA...RIGHT???

    Oh, and being the mother of girls...I haven't been as privy to the whole pee in a cup thing. However, I do have girls, my younger in particular, who likes to wait until THE LAST possible moment to advise mommy that "The tee tee is coming...NOW!" I guess what they say is right, the world is the man's toilet!

    By the way, is Kool-Aid useful when "raging on the road"? :-)

  14. Impressive! I caved and bought a DVD player too. Not used often ... but oh so necessary when melt downs occur on the road. Have a great day Jude! Kim

  15. ...........girl why are you too funny! I love the new word and you are one lucky chick to have them stay angels on the road. I'm so happy for you!

    I had kody pee in a McDonalds cup before when we took the drive form OK to TN. He did a good job but I sure was prayin' the stream made the cup...not the rim...not the seat in front of him but INSIDE the cup! lol!

    ......oh have a great day honey.