Wednesday, July 22, 2009

25 things...

Since I do have a love/hate relationship with Facebook, I should not be using one of its vices here, but I will. A few months ago it was all the rage to make a list of 25 random things. Well, as you well know if you have spent anytime reading this blog, my life is one big random blur... ranluryness is the technical term.

Anyhoo, here it is, 25 Ranluryness thoughts meandering around my mind...

1. Why is the ratio between number of hours slept and volume of children in such direct disproportion?

2. Do seagulls think people really like them? I mean, maybe they think we are waving hello and not shooing. Maybe yelling "*%&#%$* seagulls pooped on my car again!" is a compliment to them. They are thinking "Nice, I hit the target and they are waving again!"

3.If talk is cheap, I am a skinflint of major proportions.

4. Dogs lick their butts, you should never be kissing them. Think about it, if you saw your kid licking their own poop chute, how quickly would be asking junior to pucker up?

5. I think people can be a source of great disappointment and that is what leads to the willingness of folks to look the other way regarding #4.

6. If silence is golden, that would explain my love of silver...

7. I have no push pins for my corkboard in my office, despite the fact that it has been up for months. I was unable to locate cute enough pins, and gave in last week grabbing a box at Target. The purple ones will be thrown away. Haste makes waste you know...

8. I am big fan of "She's Got the Look." It makes anyone over the age of 30 feel hopeful. Not that I, personally, am over the age of 30.

9. If you can drop hints like bricks, some people's feet should really be hurting...

10. I went to the dentist last week and basically, I am going to have a very costly mouth. My mother always said my mouth would get me into trouble, who knew it would be financial woes...

11. I always thought I was a cool mom until I about went into heart palpitations when Lincoln asked me what boobies were. I made it 6 years and 11 months...

12. I want to travel to Germany and have a few brews with my honey whilst looking for my relative's homes... it would be sweet.

13. If they can make a large piece of steel that FLIES through the air, why can't they make the potty on that piece of steel a little bigger, and smell nicer? Would it be a crime to put some spray in there? A pack of clorox wipes? Really???

14. I still can't remember what ISO means, but now I know what it does.

15. It took Lincoln forever to pick out a backpack and lunch box that would "match"... he is his mother's child. Poor kid.

16. I wonder if I should be trusting a bank that cannot remember to send me a debit card with all my financial dealings???

17. I do not understand fish tacos.

18. I think lavender stinks. Maybe that's because it's purple.

19. I had to question the level of stupidity it took to give a camera guided tour a stop in the "Hidden Room" found in the depths of Michael Jackson's closet. A door that was a) sound proof and b) locked from the inside. Clearly, 2 + 2 no longer equals 4. "How cool is that?" quoteth the moron reporter...

20. I am remembering now why this list thing is stupid... it gets really old around #18, and then you are tempted to just throw things out there like "I had rice krispy cereal for dinner last night"... that is clearly not the type of interesting fact the list makers intended to make the cut. Now, if fruity pebbles were involved, maybe...

21. There were three ketchup bottles in my recycling this week. I am sure that is an accomplishment of some sort, other than the proof that a) i have neglected taking the recycling for a bit and b) my chicken must be really awful.

22. I think I could live outside, if it weren't for the bugs. or the heat. or the rain. or snakes. See, I am totally outdoorsy. 100%.

23. I ran into a ginormous bee whilst delivering something to my friend Sarah's porch. If you could have seen the wild body movements, the flailing about, the running... friends, it was not a pretty sight.

24. You know are in trouble when, you heard a monsoon type rainfall in the night, and then your husband asks you the next morning, "Did you close the car windows last night?" DOH!

25. I get a small thrill when I save so much money at the grocery store that the manager has to come over and push a special key. I wonder, who is this loser and how did I become her? I need to get out more...

Monday, July 06, 2009

Nobody Move!!!!!!

No one in this house is allowed to move.
Oh, I am serious.
The laundry is all caught up.
The hampers are empty.
There are no new new clothes permitted for the next 18 hours.

I would write more, but I think I hear the boys running around. I must stop that potentially sweat inducing behavior.
Doh! I think Alden just got dirty outside.
I can hear the washing machine snickering...