2009 Predictions...

So, I am a tad late, but there was never a promise of promptness on this blog, so here it is...

Jude's Annual List of Predictions:

first, the scrappy ones...

1. Sadly the stinking owl phase is still here. It is followed by the ever ridiculous mushroom phase... HOWEVER, both are being booted out of the Crapbooking Hall of Fame #1 position by this new arrival... PEACOCKS! Who ever looked at a peacock and said, "you know, I think these large plumed birds would be a great scrapbooking embellishment" was clearly ingesting the shrooms. Ugh, I mean, Peacocks? Really?? Technically the very name "peacock" contains two potty words.

Wait for it... there it is, the sound of shock and the open mouth, but you know its true.

2. Scrappers everywhere will drop their AC pens and grab the new Sharpies. Beth loves them, and I tried my friend Heather's out recently... they are great. Really, no sarcasm here, they are good. I mean it. No jokes. For real. I won't say anything about all the little scrappers sniffing their markers at crops either.

3.Wood Grain, wood grain, wherefore art thou wood grain letters? Well, I met the American Crafts Rep at Scrapfest and even came off my million dollar idea. I so want little wood letters, and was even willing to split the profit with the AC company 50-50... alas, I was told, wood was not acid free and hence, could not be marketed as an embellishment. Boo... plus do we really think that "CK Okay √ " can't be bought... right... and Hall of Fame is legit too...

4. Red is the new Black. I believe red is making its comeback this year. We have had enough orange, and though I love the citrusy shades, red is good too. Plus it is the name of my perfume. That last part is totally random and has nothing to do with aiding in the readability of this paragraph really...

5. Black and White Photos will be all the rage. Yeah, I totally just decided this recently, but I think, due to the over gratuitousness of color usage on papers, people will now opt for more black and white photos so they are not trying to "match" the colors of the picture to the paper. Weird, yeah, a little, but whoever said scrapbookers were normal... we PAY for ticket stubs for crying out loud! I am going to start heading to the dumpsters at the coliseum after concerts and make a killing... "Jude's authentic Junk" . Sweet.

So there you go... and now, here are some general predictions:

1. The world will stop obsessing about Michelle Obama's height after her husband's first year in office. She is really tall folks, get over it and stop comparing her to all the men she is meeting. ("Look at her towering over President Bush" , "Is she as tall as Joe Biden?" ) I would however like to see us establish talks with Cuba again just to see her stand next to Castro...

2. Brittany Spears will keep making "come back albums" and sadly, people will keep buying them... Come Back is a a SINGULAR word Brit...

3. I will learn that a clean potty 24/7 in a house with FOUR men and one toilet is an impossible task... and the fear of someone using my not perfectly clean potty will cripple me... sniff, sniff... someone hand me a Clorox wipe for my nose already!

4. Alden will stop calling milk "ma"... cause I know I am a dairy production goddess, but come on, this is a little insulting on some level. And YES, I egotistically referred to myself as a goddess, but really, people, if it is in reference to ones mammalian beverage producing abilities, is it ego or just lack of better things to brag about? I am a SAHM mom, what else could I be? The goddess of hiney wiping? laundry? pajama bottoms? Wait, I like that last one actually...

5. There is no 5. I only added it because there was 5 of the scrappy ones. So you can keep reading, but you should know, this is going nowhere really. I mean, I could throw in something in here, but then it would be a real #5, not a fake one, and I already told you it was fake so... let's just keep it that way eh?

Over and out peeps. I know, peeps is such the 2007 word, (picture that being said with a valley girl accent and slight hair toss.) but I like the word, and it is a good little Easter candy so... until I think of a new word for people, I say, if the owls can stick around, so can the peeps...

or the

olks... short for folks

ryone (pronounced "re-one") short for everyone

roops... short for group, but pluralized... nice!

A bit of the scrap stuff... all products are from Memorable Seasons... :)

And on the kidlet front...

This is Alden, AKA the fat dog.

This is Alden's fake laugh.

The fat dog knows it is cute.

The fat dog uses it well.

I love that fat dog.

And this one below was taken by my beloved Jen... she got the Nikon D40 from Santa. Is it wrong to steal from a friend?

so long 2008...

Well.

Here we are.

2009.

I am glad to tell 2008 goodbye... sorry 08, you were just not the best digits for me... I had to learn alot, give up things I did not want to, and be mature... maturity is highly overrated by the way.

We had a lovely Christmas, fraught with cookie decorating, sickness, and new toys. I think one of my favorite parts was Lincoln, insisting we leave out cookies for Santa, so that Emerson's belief in him would be encouraged. (remember, old Lincoln was mr. "santa is dead" at school last year.) So, we leave out the cookies, which Lincoln informed me HE would come back down and eat. The boys went to bed at 8:15. By 8:23 Lincoln was back down here, munching away.

I said, "What are you doing??? Emerson is going to see you! You have to wait until he asleep!!"

Lincoln, crumbily replies, "No, he is already asleep"

Now, as any good mom knows, Christmas Eve is not normally a fall asleep fast kind of night, so I was doubting this. "Are you sure?" I ask.

"Yep! I told him if he didn't go right to sleep fast, Santa would not bring him anything." I went and peeked to make sure, and seriously, if a kid can have a look of "Check me out Santa, I went to sleep really fast" on his snoozing little face, Emerson did.

So, Lincoln eats the cookies, I snapped pictures of him, and off he goes.

Fast forward to midnight, when I go to tuck the boys in, and there is piece of red paper under Em's head... I picked it up and see, scrawled in Lincoln's little handwriting,

"Dear Emerson, thanks for the cookies"

Insert collective sigh of ,"AW, that is so sweet!" I know I did. Emerson was so excited about that note, and Lincoln played it right up.

How does a kid who never believed in Santa, get so into it?

Well, if you remember last year, and the "santa is dead" incident, you may remember, that I promptly took the boys to the coffee shop that day. Emerson had been so good and earned it, once I knew about Lincoln's bold desantatizing (*yes, new word, Desantatizing.) ways at school, I let him know that little boys who ruin that belief in Santa for others did not get ice cream. (He had been told not to tell other kids too, he knew it was mean.)

Well, sitting in that coffee shop, I felt soooo mean when he pitifully watched his brother eat ice cream, and the lady works in there asked if he was having any, and I had to tell her no, he was not. I mean, he had his little head in his hands, his eyes full of tears, and I almost caved... almost. Well, that was a HARD lesson for him to learn, but clearly, a year later, he remembered NOT to ruin Christmas for others, not to say little things about Santa not being real, etc. So much so, that he went to extra efforts to make his brother happy. The lesson worked, it paid off. It made Lincoln enjoy so much fun this year. It was not enjoyable at the time, but in the end, the results were worth it...

I say all that to say this...

2008 was, as I said earlier not exactly a fun year...

There were times I wanted to stomp my foot like a little child and say, "It's not fair!" Times when I wept and begged God to intervene in situations, then felt like He wasn't. Times when I thought, "I just cannot do this."

But it is my firm belief that when God is bringing you through a trial, He is doing so for a reason, and even when it does not FEEL like it, He has your best interests in mind. GOD IS GOOD ALL THE TIME! I know I have not felt this way MANY times this year, even recently... but Faith is like a muscle, if we never got to use it, it would never gain strength. That being said, I should look like Arnold on roids at the Faith Bikini Competition this year, but i digress...

Bottom line...

Hang in there, He is not done with you yet either, I suspect...

Big Sale for the Scrappers!

Ok this is for all you scrappers who read...
Memorable Seasons is having a HUGE sale starting today....

ALL Stamps,inks, etc 50% off!
ALL Patterned Paper, 70% off!

If you are not a scrapbooker, this may mean nothing to you... BUT if you are, this means, you should stop reading this now and go fill up a cart with these goodies fast, before they are gone!!

Ok, back to post Christmas celebrating!

so, you wanna know...

You want to know why I am such a champion of blog slacktivity...

It is because my brain is gone.

For real.

Missing.

No longer with us. (well, me)

Out of here.

Hit the road.

Adios Muchachos. (goodnight irene)

It is gone...

I now do things like this...

Mail packages to myself. Yeah, it is true. I addressed a priority box to my nephew, with his street address, and my town, state, and zip. I was grossly embarrassed when the lovely mail carrier that brought it back introduced himself to me... because we go to church together! ACK!!!!! I am sure I have just jumped to his "airhead list". The best part... in my trash in the office, there sits a correctly addressed mailing label. I threw it out and re-wrote it because it didn't look "neat" enough. Being anal, it really pays off. I had to take the box back and pay to mail it again...

see brain.

see brain go.

brain is gone.

bye brain...

Proof#2 -

I went to buy my lovely husband chocolate ice cream for his birthday. Well, thanks to my mother and her curious ways, I cannot take the front box,bottle,container, etc. of anything in any store at anytime. If I am buying deodorant, milk, butter, it does not matter... I reach past the first one and take the one behind it... or if we need to be really safe, I go two or three deep. Yep, sadly this even applies to greeting cards. (you think i am kidding... all of my sisters will vouch for me!) So.... I grab the chocolate ice cream behind the first one...

and got it home

and put it in the freezer

only to discover

it was butter pecan.

I have been married to a chocoholic long enough to know that vanilla ice cream laced with pecans is in no way, shape or form, a viable substitute for chocolate. Telling Micah my mistake was highly embarrassing.

So, in closing...

well, there is no closing, I already told you I lost my brain. I am certifiably stupid.

but i still remember how to upload scrap stuff...

These were all made with October Afternoon's Paper line called "WeatherVane" from Memorable Seasons. BTW, Jill is having a HUGE sale starting December 26th... go HERE for all the details! :)

Hold your Breath...

I have been informed that I have not updated this blog enough lately... sorry. You can blame the three small children who walk behind me at all times saying Mom, mommy and mamamamamamama... Sadly I think Alden now calls milk "Mama". I feel cheated at being replaced by a beverage, but oh well...

So, many who know me, know that, I am not a big fan of the mall. I loathe the crime laden parking lot, the crowds, the teens who look like call girls. Seriously, the last time I went I thought, wow, the hookers must be using the mall for a pick up spot now. Then, said hookers hopped on their middle school field trip bus. Oh, my mistake.

Anyhoo... Me, the mall, not a love relationship. Alas, one Friday, we were there. It was approximately 3:30 in the afternoon, and the crowds were insane. Clearly, the mall was not a spot where reporters would be yapping about the recession. After getting a watch fixabroked... yeah, that is a new word. It is when you take a very lovely, expensive watch to have the battery replaced, the woman takes it in the back to do so, and you hear "POUND POUND POUND" echoing loudly through the store. She returns, your battery, not in, and says, "Did you know your crystal was broken?"

Seriously? Do I look this dumb? I looked and her, and without any hint of humor said, "No, no it was NOT broken when I came in here."

She never said another word, she just packed it up to send it off for fixing. I could not believe she tried to blame me after hearing her pounding the crap out of it in the back. I remained pleasant because A) I want my watch back and B)There was clearly no manager around to complain to anyway. That is the reason for the new word, fixabroked.

Now, onto the real reason for this post:

Holding your breath.

We make our next stop in the mall of doom, Micah goes inside and I am left in the front of the store with Alden, who is in his stroller. I spoke to a young dad in there, also with a baby in a stroller.

Well, after a couple minutes of parental back and forth small talk... "How old is he?", "Look at that hair!", "He is so cute", his wife appears and he heads into the back to look around. She and I begin the chatter only, now... now the chatter is not so good.

"Aw," I say, "your little guy looks sleepy!"

She says...

"Yeah, is sick. He has a little pneumonia." (Um, mental note, little and pneumonia, not really two words I put together.)

"Really?" I say.

"Yeah," she coughs. More coughing, then, "He got it from me, I have been sick for like two, (cough, hack, cough) weeks. It turns out I have a contagious type of pneumonia." (cough, cough, cough.)

WHAT???????????

You just told me you have contagious pneumonia, gave it to your baby, and coming to the MALL seemed like a good idea? REALLY????????????

I think it was then, that I took the first big breath... and held it. She kept talking and I kept taking little tiny steps backward, turning Alden ever so slightly away.

Thankfully, Micah came out and paid and we left the pneumonia family behind. As we go to get on the elevator, I tell Micah about the potential germ exposure... Over his shoulder, at the same moment we hear the ding of the elevator, they appear...

to join us.

in the elevator.

the very small elevator

where we will be trapped

and forced to breath the same pneumonia infested air.

"Haha, we are really not following y'all," jokes the husband.

Yeah, you aren't but your PNEUMONIA germs are!!!!!!!
I took one more big breath before boarding and was only able to communicate via a grin, a thumbs up or a nod. I was not letting that breath out for anything. We finally get off the germ express, and I fall out, gasping for fresh air... they are still behind us, and all I can hear is ...

cough

hack

cough

hack

Finally the pneumonia family made their way down a different hall.

As we walked to the car, I told Micah I felt my lungs were filling up with fluid.

He looked at me, scowled, and said, "Jude, you cannot catch and develop pneumonia in five minutes."

Ok, whatever...
The moral of the story is the mall is no place for me or anyone not capable of taking large breaths for long amounts of time.

Here are some pages from December Daily Album... click to enlarge. I have more days done, but I am too lazy to get them scanned at this point in time. :)

The cover:

Day one:

Day 2:

Day 1&2, this is how they look layered:

Day 3:

Day4:

Day 5:

Day 6:

Day 7: