So here is a knockedupedness observation for all of you... Adrienne brought this to mind when I read her post today and she asked about driving a 5 speed... I say...
Why drive a 5 speed... ???
Seriously... Micah tried to teach me to drive one when I was first learning to drive a car. I think it was doomed to fail since my first question was "Which one is the gas pedal? the long skinny one or the short fat one?" Clearly, I did not need to involve a third pedal here. Then a couple years ago, we had to borrow a car when ours was being fixed... and yep, it was a 5 speed. So... he takes me out on our quiet little road. I am doing AOK with the gear switching, etc. although I think it is a waste of time and a car should know what gear to be without me having to tell it via the clutch, but anyway...
We go to turn around. I am sitting there, and suddenly the car starts to roll backwards. I slam on the brakes, and look at the gear shift... we are clearly in "1" not in "R", so I look at Micah perplexed. He informs me that, 5 speeds can/will roll back sometimes...
WHAT??? Why on earth would I want to drive a car that goes backwards when I haven't told it to??? I also realized that putting on makeup, eating, etc, would all be nearly impossible. This was too demanding of my time and attention I decided. I promptly refused to learn anymore, and hence, I do not know how to drive a 5 speed.
Sorry to all of you gear shifting lovers, you clutch popping car experts, I, Jude, declare my laziness and desire to never own or operate a stick shift!
So there you have it... that is the opinion for the day, brought to you by "ornery am I"... if this keeps up I may have to delve into other hot topics such as toilet paper rolls... over or under? Should white be worn after labor day? and maybe even the proper pronunciation of Arkansas...
*** I have been asked how the pressure washing went. He stole our car... JUST KIDDING! He did a good job, didn't have a ladder to reach the eaves, no big deal though. I was a little nervous when he asked for cash and kept trying to figure out every which way for Micah to go get him cash...um, no. Here is a check. And I already checked to see that it posted without him adding an extra zero. :) I am such a truster of humanity eh???? ***
Linda tagged me for this little game, so here goes...
1. YOUR ROCK STAR NAME: (first pet & current car) Tinker Excursion
2.YOUR GANGSTA NAME: (fav ice cream flavor, favorite cookie) Cookies and Cream Oatmeal
3. YOUR "FLY Guy/Girl" NAME: (first initial of first name, first three letters of your last name) Mine is lame sounding, so I am making one up... I will be J Biggie (as in I cannot possibly get any bigger in size)...
4. YOUR DETECTIVE NAME: (favorite color, favorite animal) Green Giraffe
5. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME: (middle name, city where you were born) Anne Buffalo
6. YOUR STAR WARS NAME: (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first) Again, mine is lame, so here is one "princess ornery" that is much more suited to me at this point in time...
7. SUPERHERO NAME: (2nd favorite color, favorite drink put "The") Red the Water (after delivery of this elephantine baby it will be Red the Reisling heehee )
8. NASCAR NAME: (the first names of your grandfathers) Please, I am german, and my nascar name should be something southern and hyphenated, like Jilly-Jo, or Billy-Sue, or something...
9. STRIPPER NAME: ( the name of your favorite perfume/cologne, favorite candy) Red Candy Corn (now that is why I can never be a stripper...)
10.WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: (mother's & father's middle names ) I could tell you this, but then I would have to kill you...
That's all for tonight... hopefully next time you hear from me it will from a lovely bed at the hospital after a ten minute delivery of a 7lb baby... :)
I leave you with the latest LO for Unpubbed...
HA! I'm so with you on that! LOL, why learn! LOL
ReplyDeleteI never wanted to drive a stick either...and then I went to the car dealer and bought one. It sat in my driveway a whole week before I decided to drive it! I finally learned and it was fun for a while.
ReplyDeleteToilet paper-up
White after labor day, absolutly!
ummmm what were your other questions? I"ve already forgotten!
Can't wait to see that baby when I get back! Shes coming Monday, I can feel it!
shoot, I missed the date and the weight.
ReplyDeleteLOVE your "names" and my first car was a stick. It was so much fun to drive and I totally did it while eating and applying make-up.
:)
so agree, automatic all the way for me!
ReplyDeletexo
HA! That is toooooo funny, and OK I agree, you should not be a stripper, at least until the knockedupness state is behind you (I just crack myself up, get it, behind you???? Okay, I'll leave it there).
ReplyDeleteFAB lo girl. I love that, totally beautiful and I will leave you with this thought.
My dad would not let me get a license until I learned to drive the stick shift because "every girl should know how to drive a stick shift, just in case>" So he taught me, in his Red Corvette. Oh poor poor pitiful me. huh. So, needless to say, I drive a stick like a crazy woman. LOL
Love and hugs ornery.
love the BROTHER"S LO!! so soft and pretty!!
ReplyDeleteI SO AGREE WITH YOU ON THE 5 SPEED!!! I can handle the gear shifting okay...but stopping and starting on a hill??? DUDE...i ahve issues with going backwards down a hill!!! LOL...funny thing...it doesn't even have to be a hill...just a tiny little incline and I am screwed!!! And once in motion...that is WAY TOO MUCH TO THINK about!!
love your names!!! your stipper name had me busting out!!! too funny!!
okay...so today's the day right?? Friday, the 14th...supper time would be a good time to go...you didn't want to cook anyway, right?? here's to wishing you deliver your 9lbs elephant soon!!
oh my word!! i've never seen that name thing before, definitely cracking up.
ReplyDeleteand to give you a heads up: my 3rd was born in june and while it wasn't 10 minutes, how's 2 hours start to finish, 8lbs. 11oz! it just might. by the time we got big bro and sis with friends i was at the hospital 1 hour. you're body will be ready to let go:)
My first car was a stick shift. My Dad took me out to learn how to drive it because it sat in their driveway for a week while I drove the automatic my sisters and I shared (they were not impressed that I was still driving their car!) So my Dad takes me out and the first thing he says is "You really don't know how to drive one of these do you?" "Well no Dad - that's why you're teaching me!" "Oh" he says "I thought you must have had a boyfirend who taught you this and I was just helping you brush up on technique." Needless to say it took me awhile to feel comfortable - especially with the rolling backwards issue. I drove 2 stickshift Hondas for about 8 years and although I don't anymore - I still enjoy it from time to time.
ReplyDeleteWhen is that baby going to get here girl?
Hope all is well!
Love ya kim
Jude, you are too funny. I am totally feeling you on the 5 speed thing. As much as vehicles cost these days...they should KNOW which speed to be in and when! Sorry, I'll just buy a vehicle that "looks" like it has a gear shift. I remember when my mom got her first 5 speed...a BMW no less. She didn't know how to drive this thing AT ALL! And one morning when we woke up, her beemer was in the middle of the street...she left it in "R"! :-) She now drives a horse and buggy...LOL.
ReplyDeleteHey, I'm looking forward to the TP and Arkansas posts...
Love your "names". I did this one a while back. Very cute.
I just want to say that you do NOT look like you are carrying a 9+ pound baby in you!
ReplyDeletewell girlfriend if you are having a 9 pound baby then as soon as that baby is born you will be back skinny because lord knows you are all baby and nothing else ...i was a big huge elephant...{deep sigh} so wished i looked as good as you at 9 months pregnant....YOU SUCK!! lol
ReplyDeleteLOL
ReplyDeleteI hope you make it into labor soon. ALL of my kids were near 9 lbs and my third daughter was almost 10!!! Pregnancy was an excuse to EAT!!! ha!
Love the unpubbed layout!
I LOVE stick shifts and kinda miss having one!!
ReplyDeleteRed Candy Corn!! Love it!!
ReplyDeleteAnd, I will never drive anything other than automatic. Have you ever tried to text while driving a stick? Not possible...
People who drive stick are not multi-tasking while driving..
Your tummy looks so cute!!! :) Funny about the gear shifts! I know. I rode with a friend and saw her struggling to eat McDonald's, smoke and still try to shift gears in DC area traffic!! I thought, "No way!!" so why bother. I think men (and women) get a charge from that feeling of control. But I guess I don't need it!! :)
ReplyDelete