Thursday, May 05, 2011

Dear Daughter...

Don't freak out, that is not some weird way of announcing that I am in a state of knockedupedness again. I have just been looking at our three little boys, whom I have been entrusted with screwing up raising up. It is humbling to think I have a future husband, father, employee, coach, etc. in my charge. As I realized how quickly almost 9 years have passed with Lincoln, I began to think of the future and the Lord really laid it on my heart to begin a more regular and specific time of prayer for their wives; my future daughters in law. These three are all so very different in temperament, habits, inclinations, and personality. I realized, a general, "Lord, help them marry someone nice" was just not going to cut it.

 Lincoln, he is a giver. He can't have someone demanding, or he'll just give in to her all the time. He is also very empathetic and thoughtful, so he would be a good husband to a girl who needs reassurance, and to be shown kindness she may have missed growing up. He will pamper her in word and deed.

 Emerson, he is... stubborn. He needs someone who will keep him on his toes, and know when to give in and when to dig her heels in. He is also a jokester, so he would be a good husband to someone who likes to laugh. Since he gets his feelings hurt easily, I think he would be sensitive to a girl who is like that as well. He would know when to stop the joking and when to give that sweet girl compliments. He will also be fiercely loyal.

 Alden, he is so sweet. I mean, really sweet. He will be a good match for a girl who likes to be treated with kind words, and lots of hugs. He also knows when to turn on that charming smile, so his gal will need to be smart on her toes, and know when to give him the what for, and when to allow that sweet grin to melt her heart and anger.

So you see, since they are all so different, the prayers for their future spouses need to be too. I want to pray, not only for them to be good, godly men, but for specific character strengths. I also want to pray for these future daughters... for  their character, their disposition, and above all else, that they love Jesus with a fierce heart. Christ first, my son, second.

All three boys know, and have this drilled in their heads regularly...
We don't care where she is from, if she is tall or short, what color her skin is, or if she is rich or poor. Our only absolute, is that she loves Jesus. So, in all this thinking and praying, and of course sobbing over the lightning speed with which these children are growing, I decided to write each of these sweet girls some letters.
 I will keep them, and when they boys have their betrothed, those precious girls will receive the letters. My plan is to write them periodically, over the next however many years. I want the girls to hear funny stories, and how their soon to be husband accomplished things, struggled, and grew. I also want them to hear how I was, as the boys' mom, and gain understanding of my heart. I know, I do scrapbook some of these things, but since I won't be giving those away until I DIE, I want to give them something tangible.

So... sweet, future daughters, until we meet...


  1. A couple weeks ago Keith and I were talking about our future daughter in laws and son in laws. And Keith specifically said he wanted our girls to marry boys like yours... because Keith knew boys like yours.....they would be loyal and defend and protect and love and honor and respect. Cause they are being taught these most important Jesus like skills everyday. Not saying we should trade chickens and arrange a marriage, cause honestly, KR and Hadji would most likely not live happily ever after together! But praying for our little blessings to be blessed by a spouse is a daily prayer. I may just need to write some letters. Can't wait to sit at their weddings remembering this very post. Precious factor is high today my friend!

  2. This is just too too sweet. :heart Love the letter idea!

  3. Jude, Loved the blog. Just want you to know that I pray regularly that they will be godly men, godly leaders, have godly friends, sweet spirits, have godly wives, and that they will outgrow their allergies.

  4. i love this idea. dang your boys are handsome! and your future daughter-in-laws have no idea how lucky they are!

  5. I'm never reading your blog again.

    Not until we're neighbors, anyways, and you can tell me the things you plan to blog about ahead of time, so I can prepare.

    SO crazy that I've been thinking such similar thoughts lately. Ever since Simon has taken interest in this totally demanding little diva.

    I want the same virtues in my DILs. I pray for her parents as they raise her, too. I so hope to have DILs that are raised similarly to the way I raise my boys, but know that that might not happen. They could come from a horrible situation. I want them to know Jesus. I want them to understand true salvation. Oh man, this comment could get long.

    Please move to Texas. And then wherever we happen to go after that. :D I need you on my compound. And the three, er four strapping young men of yours wouldn't hurt either.

    I miss you.

  6. such a sweet post jude. loved reading it and loved hearing about your boys this way too!

    your daughter in laws will defintiely be some lucky girls...for their spouse and their MIL :)

  7. This touched my heart deeply...this was beautiful. I feel this would only mean as much to them as it does to you if you have boys. Some how I don't see my daughters husband caring much about my letters...but we'll see.

  8. Love it! The first time I spoke with Chris' mom on the phone, she said, "Kate we are so excited to meet you. We know you must be special the way Christopher talks about you. We have been praying for you since Christopher was a little boy."

    I was so touched to think that she had purposed prayer for Chris' wife (me). Good job Mama Jude. Your prayers matter for those unknown ladies!