Stocking Stuffers...

Question:

What do you stuff in your kiddos stockings?

Really, I want to know. This is not some lead in to a funny story about stockings in our house, oh wait... it could be. Hadji did very selflessly give Lincoln some of his precious beer caps that he collects, in his stocking, last year. Nothing says brotherly love like a few Sam Adams' lids...

I need some new ideas. We usually do a car, a new toothbrush, some traditional candies from my childhood, and that's it. I think it is a little stocking sarcasm funny to put in candy AND a toothbrush. (I hope my dentist isn't reading this. If you are Mike, please know I am kidding... I put things like carrots, broccoli and a water bottle in the stockings. Yeppers.)

So what stuff do you stuff?

Photo Madness

Ah, the holidays... when we ask small children to wear scratchy sweaters and pose in series of fake snowy scenes to grace our Christmas cards or scrapbooks or one of those odd braggy letters we call "family updates". I am not one such mom. I would however like, just occasionally, a photo where one of my children is not picking their nasal cavity like they've discovered a tunnel to a candy factory. I mean, we get kid A to smile and kid B is picking. Kid B is picking and then Kid C decides to smile. By the time they are all looking at the camera, smiles lovingly threatened into place, someone farts.

Here is a series of shots. Why post the bad ones you say? Because it grates on my every nerve when people pose only perfect pictures of their kids all the time, as if no one ever nose picks. Or farts. Or licks their brother's face. Ok, maybe that last one is just our clan...

Sadly, I think this was our best shot... there's always next year...

Happy December...

I am going to blog every day for the next 25 days. (but it is highly likely I will miss one or 8 days. Just a warning.) It is my Christmas gift to you... or your first lumps of coal depending on how you feel about this here blog. This is for all the people who like to remind (read:hassle) me about not updating more regularly. Regular is for bowel movements. I am a spontaneous (read:lazy) blogger, hence the irregular pattern of my posts.

So, December is here. That means three little boys are getting excited about waking up at the butt crack of dawn and opening gifts. Two of the three think a fat man in a red suit left them. One of them was far to logical to ever believe that one. (remember the "Santa is dead incident?It is still something we chuckle about round the casa.)

I still struggle with the gifts.I mean... what about buying each other gifts says "Welcome to the world Jesus"??? Please, don't e-mail me about how the wise men brought Jesus gifts, or it is like a "birthday party for Jesus". Really? I would personally not enjoy a birthday party where everyone else, but ME got gifts. Talk about your sucky celebrations.

So, in light of all that cold water I just threw on your Christmas plans, what is a family to do? Well, here are a few ideas...

1. Just ignore the above and buy gifts you can't afford, running up credit card bills and spoiling your children. Don't bother to mention Jesus, that would be like asking him to bless your super sized McDonald's meal. Yes, that is a slam to gluttony too. (that is what we call a sarcastic twofer.)

2. No tree. No gifts. No Nothing. This would be the purist approach, and though it may make your legalistic side feel good, if your kids ever see a childhood photo of you in front of a tinsel laden tree surrounded by wrapping paper bits, you are parental toast. This what we call the Hypocrites approach to the holidays.

3. For real, this is what we do.

A)We have a tree, decorate, watch Christmas movies, etc. We even buy gifts... in MODERATION. The one year we bought alot of gifts, was a total let down. More toys does not equal more happiness. We now buy each kid one nice, larger gift and a few smaller ones. When they get less, they actually play more. Honest.

B)Celebrate Advent. I know, anyone of the baptist persuasion reading this is gasping for air, but hang with me. Each night you read a passage of scripture, light your advent candles, and actually pray and talk about Jesus. It is not a ritual, it is good solid tradition. I love the memories of the advent wreath from my childhood, and hope my boys will too. I do have a struggle with the purple candle, but we press on anyway.

C)The Earn and Buy. I give the boys extras chores. Hard ones. They earn money and we go buy toys for either a shoebox/stocking/etc for someone else. This year I am going to see if they want to just donate the money to http://www.hopechest.org/ , the group our church works with in Africa. The key here is making them work to earn the money. If I just toss them a $10 bill to buy something, it really has not cost them anything. Giving away something they earned, that is where they learn about true giving.

So, there you have it. There are lots more things we do to celebrate, but I am saving those for other days. We have to stretch out this material the way your mama used to add water to the ketchup to get that last little bit to make one more hot dog.

Welcome December. All you fun people (read:nags) may regret (read:painfully regret) reminding me to update more regularly... I feel like I should mention raisin bran for some reason...

Hadji, God, and Lies...

It was a first. Hadji came home and told me a bully had taken something from him. I know this sort of thing happens, but he was so pitiful with his head down, crying, saying, "It was the bestest rat ever." Then he told us the story...

A boy came up at the playground and said, "Give me that rat or I'm going to punch you in the nose." This is where the fact that Hadji had gotten a rubber rat out of the treasure box is good information to have. I did not have this information. Anyway... Hadji gave the kid the rat. I was kind of surprised. I mean, this is the kid who at age FOUR beat down an 8 year old at the park. (Note: If you are shooting your Nerf gun directly at my little sweet Hadji's face and he keeps asking you stop, and you don't, it might not end well for you.) This is the same kid who smacked a 12 year old in the face for picking on a little girl from kindergarten at the PTA Ice Cream Social. Yep. True Story. Yeah, I am not on the PTA Board this year... )

So, I was a little surprised that Hadji gave in. I asked him more questions, but he didn't know the kid, didn't know whose class he was in, etc. well, there is not much a parent can do with this, so I just typed up an e-mail to his teacher, just so she would know it happened. I hesitated to hit the send button. Call it, mommy gut-instincts, fear of a grammatical error laden e-mail being sent, who knows... but I decided to wait and let Micah read it first.

At bedtime, as I am tucking Hadji in, I ask him, one more time... "Is what you told Mommy about the rat true?" He just looked away. Hmmm... "Hadji, did you tell me the TRUTH or a LIE?"

He finally says, sheepishly, "Not really. I just thought it was a funny story."

OH

MY

WORD

First, I am glad I didn't send the e-mail. Second, I went into lecture mode. (we did get the real story. a little girl did keep his rat after he let her see it. recovery efforts are now in progress.) We talked about trust, and how lies ruin that. We talked about how God hates lies, and we want our mouths to speak the truth. Just when I think he gets it, he really gets it and start giving myself that proverbial good parent pat on the back... Hadji looks up and wistfully sighs, "I sure do wish God liked lies."

I officially resign.

the end.

Halloween Economics

This is the motley crew we managed to costume up at the casa de fingerprint this year. I told them if they didn't take a nice photo I would eat all their candy. Nothing says Happy Family Memory like threatening children before declaring, "Say Cheese!"

We had Buzz Lightyear.

His long hair hanging out the back of the hood like an 80s rat tail was sweet.

Creepy Skeleton Man
AKA I am a lazy 8 year old who has figured out I just need a costume to get the candy.

and... The Karate Kid.

Obviously my gentle natured Hadji had trouble getting into character.

Now, onto the opinion based blog portion of the post. We went out trick or treating with some friends and their offspring. It was great fun. We hit a church trunk or treat. Then we hit the neighborhood and the boys and girls had their little bags and pumpkins chock full by 830 when we headed for home. As I sorted out the candy into nut and nut free piles that night, it hit me...

A child's trick or treat bag is a great thermometer for our economy.

I thought this as I noted the absence of Reese's cups, Three Musketeers and Milky Ways. You see in a flourishing economy, chocolate abounds. The over abundance of smarties says, "Tighten those belt loops."

Here is the candy break down:

Thriving Economy Candies:
Reese's Cups
Three Musketeer
Milky Ways
Twix
Snickers
and even Baby Ruth.
**Don't even try and put Almond Joys in this category. They are what desperate children eat around December 1st.

OK Economy Candies:
Nerds
Starburst
Pixie Sticks
M&M's
Airheads

We are in trouble and it shows Candies:
Laffy Taffy
Smarties
Double Bubble Gum
Gobstoppers
Dum Dums
and those weird "Candy Sticks" from the Dollar Store. They are cigarettes folks. Just because the end has not been dabbed with the tell tale red paint, don't be fooled. They are Candy Cigarettes in disguise. (I prefer to buy my kids the actual ones that come in a fake cigarette box, like I had as a child. Ah, sweet dysfunctional memory passing down. I love the holidays.)

Anyhoo the worst thing you as an economist trick or treater can see is... Hard Candy. If a StarBrite Mint hits your kids bucket, you best get home and hunker down.