A little trip and a lesson for Micah...

So, I haven't just been a lazy blogger. We were traveling last week. We made a quick trip to see my family. The weather was perfect up there (yes, that is rare for Buffalo I know!) Window fans like AC at night, and a breezy 70 degrees during the day. The boys had fun playing with their cousins, and were really good in the car. Here are two new trip pointers:

#1 Always take a map... we got stuck in traffic miles long on the highway (um, something about merging we don't get apparently!) We turned back and bought a map at a gas station and went the back way. The cost of said map... $4.95! That is one of those cheesy little paper maps too, you know the kind that no one can fold up correctly on the first try.

#2 Don't drink tons of water while in a state of knockedupedness... a knockeduped bladder is NOT the same size a normal one.

#3 If you are stopping at a hotel halfway, with the point being to swim in the indoor pool, ask if the pool is operational before booking said hotel. You never know when a high school basketball team will rip an entire liner out thus closing the pool indefinitely.

Onto the other part of our title... "Micah learns a lesson". I feel responsible a little, I mean this did happen at my mom's house... but he should have known better too...

You see, my mom loves, and I mean LOVES to keep things. All manner of things... old bills (and I do mean cancelled checks and electric bills from the 70s!) magazines, just stuff. Well, unfortunately she also feels this odd attachment to foods...

Micah and I once found salad dressing that was 4 years past its expiration date in her fridge. So, you see, he is armed with this knowledge. You will find all manner of outdated food and beverage in there. I admit, it is a little scary. BUT I know what to look out for. (NEVER use her salad dressing... seriously, I think if you listen closely danger bells from the food ghosts start to go off in warning.)

When we got there, I went to put the three TINY cooler packs in her freezer... first off there is no room anywhere. That's cause if it doesn't get eaten, it gets frozen! I think cottage cheese might be one of the few "non freezables" to mom. So, I am looking, looking, and I see like 40 butter wrappers stuck in there on a shelf. I say, "Mom, what are all these butter wrappers in here for???"

"Well, you can use them to grease pans for baking, like when you make bread," was her reply.

Hmmm??? Really? Cause I think the last time I remember my mom making bread was when I was in a training bra. (note, she is an excellent cook, I am not mocking her bread making ability. I would hate to rile the yeast lovers out there.)

So, one morning, I notice Micah has had some coffee... with creamer...
I ask him, "Micah, did you check the date on that before you used it?"

He says, "No, your mom just gave it to me."

FOOL!! Her perky early morning spirit tricked you!!! I go the the fridge and what do I find... the creamer he used...

Expiration date....

April 30 .... 2006!!!!

He was so grossed out, and was going, "Why? Why would she give me that?"

Well, the answer my friends is simple...

My mom is doing some sort of secret botox experiment by giving unsuspecting people internal botulism to see if it gives the desired effect on the crows feet. I don't know why!!

It gets even better... we explored further and found another creamer. The date???

Are you ready???

November 20th.... 2005!!!!!!!!!
Don't get me started on the odd colored orange juice or the Kudos granola bars from 2004..
Just in case you think I am kidding, I took these as proof...

And yes, I did make fun of my mom to her face so I am not being mean. She even swore that they were still good, and I told her "Ok, sister, YOU are using that 2005 in your coffee tomorrow!" Um, yeah, they were gone by the time I got up the next day...

Here are some Niagara Falls pics too... the boys loved The Maid of the Mist. It is a boat ride that gets you right up close to the falls. So cool. We had a minor issue at the Canadian border because I failed to bring the boys birth certificates... in my defense... they are not required until 2008, I checked. Plus growing up in WNY I have hopped across that border so many times with no ID I didn't think it would be an issue. Thanks to Lincoln's cuteness and his Sam I am talking to the lady, she waved off the inspectors... Phew.

Speech lessons please...

Not for me... for my little Emerson.

He has a few choice mispronunciations. Here is the cream of the crop though...

For a long time now, he has said the word truck. Only in the language mind of Em here is how it gets translated...

truck = no tr sound... only the lovely "F". Yep, that makes it sound like my two year old is saying the "F" word. And no, I cannot even bring myself to type it. Plus, once that word is out there in cyberspace, who knows what some freak could key word and end up here... I digress...

The lovely "truck" which can sometimes come out "fruck" has been said for a while. It is wonderful when shopping and elderly people talk to him and he says

"I have a "_uck. A big big _uck" Nice.

One time we even ran into our pastor at the grocery store... Emerson excitedly told about the trucks he had with him... over and over and over. Thankfully he understood, but still... you wonder if people think he is hearing this at home. (um, he's not, but thanks for wondering!)

Now, we come to last week...

We are in the car, and Emerson sees a large dumptruck. Only when he talks about a dumptruck he leaves off the "P" sound in dump... think for a minute...

Dump - minus the "p"

+ truck minus the "tr" and subbed in with an "F"

Did you say it? Do you know what my child know says ALL the time when we are driving...

"Look Ma! Look at the Dum_uck! "

Yes, this is really true, and he is obsessed with dumptrucks and all we hear about all day are all the "Dum_ucks".

In other news, Lincoln has taken the word summer vacation to heart. He is still fast asleep, at 8:45am. He even told Micah last night that he was planning on sleeping in. Love it!! His last day of school was yesterday, and were I not so lazy I would go upload the pictures of the little cutie on his last day, and getting his little certificate to go to kindergarten. (um, the lack of photo would indicate that I am in fact being lazy, we will blame it on the... come on, you know what I am going to type... the current state of knockedupedness!!) I have some LOs handy, I'll scan those and get them on here. These are for the new baby's book. I will get a new belly shot this week to prove that despite the 1 pound weight gain, my girth is great. That should totally be a country song... "My Girth is Great" by Cindy Sue and the Knockedupedness Band. I know, now you can't understand why I don't have a career in the music industry...

Where have I been???

I have no clue... I have been a blog reading slacker, a posting slacker, and a comment slacker. I sit down with good intentions and then, BAM something interrupts me. Apologies all around, I will attempt to get caught up in he next couple of days. My bloglines read 84 feeds to read last night. I just got scared and went to see who won america's next top model. Sorry all...

What have we been up to???
Let's see... Several weeks ago we tried potty training Emerson... How did it go you ask??? Well, he is in a diaper now if that tells you anything. He just had no clue what was going on. Micah said he was standing there drinking water, and Micah asked him, "Em, do you need to peepee?"
"No, dad, I dry." Micah looks down to see pee, literally running down his legs. "Em, are you sure you're DRY?"
"Yes, daddy, I dry"
So, yeah, the future of America rests in the hands of children like this... they don't even know when they are urinating on themselves. (well, let's face it, some politicians now are the same way so...)
My official apologies to the little church on the way to school, and the Copeland's parking lot which became our potties in times of desperation on this failed training attempt.

I went to the doctor last week. I was dreading, and I do mean dreading getting weighed. I insist on taking my shoes off and any heavy jewelry must go as well. You never how much those wedges add to the weigh in total... The funny part... I LOST 4 lbs. Yep, I was pretty shocked, the midwife rechecked, and I declared "This is the best doctor's appointment ever!" So, I have gained a sum total of 1 pound. My huge belly would tell you otherwise, and once i can see my backside, if this precious baby is sucking away fat from it, (as I am hoping) I swear, I will spoil it rotten as a thank you.

What else? Well, Emerson's head swelled like a balloon after petting a dog. I was doing a girls hair for her wedding when Micah called to let me know that Em's eyes were swollen shut, and where was the Benadryl? In the diaper bag I told him... Um no, the mother of the year here, just glanced at the bottle, didn't actually pick it up, and it was empty. Yeah, hot curling iron in one hand, mommy guilt in the other... nice. I get home, skipping the actual wedding because I know I will worry the whole time. Em wakes up and sure enough, his little eyes were still all swollen-little puffy slits. Then I look and realize, those already normally chubby cheeks are swollen too, and when he says something, even the poor kid's tongue was swollen. No more dog petting for this boy. Sad too, because he LOVES dogs...
(Yes, Jena, we do have an epi pen. :) I knew you would worry!! )

So, there you have it... Weight gain, urination issues, and swollen heads... that is where I have been. I think my life is getting boring in this current state of knockedupedness... I will try and spice it up a bit by the next post...which could be this week or next year based on your time zone and expectations of me...
If this was all to boring for you to read...
Here is the last challenge I did for UnPubbed. Go, check out our new famer, and participate. I guarantee you will have fun, well, not really so don't e-mail complaining if you didn't ok? Seriously, we have a great new famer up next, and a cool LO challenge... :) Your 15 minutes could be next!

The Devil, Daniel Webster ,and Charlie Daniels

Well, we had a busy, fun weekend. I did absolutely NOTHING at all scrappy for NSD. (for Lidbom, that means National Scrapbooking Day. Don't worry, next year Lorena, Jen and myself will force you to celebrate it. Are you starting to fear your decision about work yet???)

Lincoln had his first soccer game on Saturday and he did great. He broke his arm after 2 games last year, so he really is new to it. I had literally just said to another mom, "I really don't know if Lincoln gets what he is doing yet, " when he pummeled the ball into the net for a goal! I may have to insult him more often... He actually scored twice, and he was sooooo proud!
Now, onto my title there...
Here is how it all went down...
The boys and I are on our way to church. (micah has gone on early) SO, we are in Micah's car, and I look down and see the word "Disc" on the CD player, so I think he has some mixed disc of music in. He is the music lover around here, I just listen when he plays it. So, I hear this great little song playing. Now, I should also say here, we are sooooooo careful about what we listen to because we have two little boys who take it all in. Plus, I once caught myself singing "I Like Big Butts" and was truly disturbed when I actually thought about what I was saying. I don't like big butts... well, okay, I don't like MY big butt.
Anyway, I digress. We are careful about what we play. But this song is familiar, and I know some of the words and turn it up, and it goes into this instrumental section. I thought it was some song by Carmen. He is a christian rock and roller... so I knew it would be fine for the boys to hear. I turn the music Waaaayy up... we are jamming now. Lincoln has his little air guitar out and is just a playing. Emerson is bobbing his head and bouncing up and down. Then the lyrics come back and as I sing some of the words, I slowly realize... this is not Carmen. And when I hear the Charlie Daniels Band say "Devil you son of a gun" I began to realize this was not in fact a song I necessarily want the boys to hear plus... I felt a little bad because hello??? We are on our way to church... So I quickly found some nice worship song for the duration of our trip to church. I know it isn't a "bad" song... I mean the devil does lose, but it is hardly church prep music either...
Tannis had asked me for some music I like... well Tannis, now you know why I should clearly NOT be in charge of music selections of any kind.
The best part... I was telling a friend about this whole tainted car ride to church, and called the song "The Devil and Daniel Webster". As in, the short story we all read in high school. Yeah, I am sure they will set that to music real soon. I bet more kids would read it if they did...
So, in closing...
I like the song "The Devil Went down to Georgia".
I like Carmen.
The two are not the same.
"The Devil and Daniel Webster" should not be required reading. And...
I, in my current state of knockedupedness cannot be expected to get any song title, artist, or even genre correct.

Fire on the mountain, run boys run...

Tagged and my purse...

So, I am trying to stay awake and not take a nap. No matter what time I go to bed, I am always sleepy by the early afternoon. So I am typing this, answering some e-mails ( I am way behind!!) and listening to Lincoln play.

I was tagged by Nicole a while back and am just now getting around to it... yeah, yeah, I know... You are supposed to list "Seven Weird Things ABout Me." Really? Just 7? That should be easy...

1.I am anal about organizing, but then things end up messy anyway. Like my scrapping area. I find this highly annoying and would like a massive house to spread the junk out in a little.
2.I love popsicles and as the weather warms up I could eat a whole box over the course of a day. I have a new favorite kind too... They are SOUR flavored... YUM!
3. The fact that I love popsicles may not be too weird, but that I hide from kids to eat them, (so they won't keep asking for them!) that is a little weird, lets be honest.
4.I think I keep buying and using Heidi Swapp BLING just because I like to say the word 'BLING" and would feel like a nerdy mom if I ever tried to use it in any other context.
5. I always use two tissues to blow my nose. I never even realized until a co-worker pointed it out. I guess subconciously my hands want to be as far away from the boogers as possible.
6. I like my cereal a little soggy so I leave it for a few minutes before i will eat it. It used to gross out my college roomie Kelli alot...
7.I only like ONE kind of chapsitck and I use it alot. I can't get it here anymore, and I am starting to worry... I stocked up literally 8 or so years ago, and I am now on my last tube. (stop cringing, it's chapstick it doesn't go bad!) So, if anyone has access to Chap-et brand Regular Flavor, please let me know.



Now, Telah tagged me for a most embarrassing thing... you are to show the inside of your purse. Thankfully I had cleaned mine out a couple days before, though some of you may be doubtful about that. SO here is the abyss that is my purse... My saving grace is the fact that there is a lovely Coach clutch in the midst of all that madness... Courtesy of my sister Patti. :)

Here's the pictures, have a lovely evening, and I am tagging

Beth
The Bibbs
Chrissy
Nicole
Corey
*** You must take a picture TODAY of your purse and show it to us
NO pre-photo cleaning... let's see it in all its glory! ***


Here is where I normally park the purse.

Here is the photo with the tissue paper and a Target bag still visible. I was at a shower the night before and these were things I had to shove in my purse when I came in the house. It bugs Micah when I leave "my crap" as he calls it,in his car. So, into the abyss went the tissue and the bag... If I hadn't had to take these pictures they would probably still be there...

Here is a great shot... all my junk in plain sight... I want a "boxy" type bag because they always stay neater.

So, yeah, its the inside of my purse... I know you will all sleep better tonight knowing what it contains... I should feel worse for wasting your time with it, but in my current state of knockedupedness (HA! I told you I would get it in on every post!) I seem to no longer have interesting things to write about... Maybe I should color my hair again and see what happens...